Things haven't been too swell lately, academically and otherwise, that there are days when I sincerely feel so down I imagine freezing my ass off in Antarctica. Today though, I feel so fortunate to have attended a class wherein a professor actually took time to lecture not only about medicine but also about life. Today I realized many things. First:
1. You are as strong as you believe you are.
It doesn't matter whether or not your self-perceived greatness is at par with others' parameters. The crucial argument here is that you SHOULD believe in yourself. The moment you lose sight of feeling like you can conquer the world, you lose the chance of actually doing so right then and there.
2. Grades are not the most important things in life.
Well, I knew this long ago. Frankly, I'm not much of a fan of grades. It's just that, when you're surrounded by people who think it matters more than actually enjoying the learning process, you tend to forget. But I take victory in even the small victories in med life. And today, listening to accounts from one of our lecturers, once again, my belief in the greater things in life remain validated. I'd rather not top an exam, only to end up dead even before the results are released (Long story. Ask one of my classmates or ask me when you see me.).
3. One must find time for everything.
In the very monotonous life of med, you must find ways to make time for things that make you happy. (Yes, I know, I said that we should find happiness in studying... but of course, the kind of happiness that a legitimate leisure activity brings is a lot more exciting. HAHA). Frankly, I've set aside my love for books for the past months because I've grown tired of reading transes. But now, I try to make it a point to read at least one chapter per day. Eventually, I will finish a book... then another after that. I want to develop and keep leisure reading as a habit. Even if it's the same activity (READING), by the virtue that they are not of the same substance makes it detoxifying.
4. Positivity is infectious. Spread it around.
Red pill or blue pill? I'm a very transparent person. If it's a crappy day, you can see it in my face. If it's a happy day, well, I'll probably be running around smiling all day. But given the choice which affect to try to apply to daily life, I say go with the positive. I'm not saying that one should simply "ACT" positive--for show--even if they actually want to run over the next person they see (whoever it may be). I'm saying that we all have a choice: to bask in our loneliness or to conquer it head on with head held high. The mark of resilience is being able to persist despite all odds. Why choose to be sad? Why choose to be miserable, when you can be infectiously happy, instead? Find the good amidst the bad and you'll realize that there are a lot of things to be thankful for.
5. When you think there's nothing you can do about it, YOU'RE WRONG.
I am a firm believer in the saying that life is unpredictable. Often, it can surprise you in the most odd of ways. Life is hard. Life is challenging. Whoever says that life is an absolute breeze is either lying or crazy. You will face many different problems and trials which will test you even when you feel you're at wits end. You must remember though that the moment you stop trying, you lose. It's not enough to simply accept what life gives you. We must all take an active role in running our lives: constantly thinking about making good choices and also enjoying every second we decide to make worth remembering.
Writing this post is my way of shunning all the negativity in my life. I don't want to be jaded this early. I still believe that we are all capable of great things. I remain hopeful in the infinite possibilities ahead. The pep talk that our lecturer gave earlier made me feel that sometimes, all it takes is for one person to believe in you. I probably won't end up having the highest grades, I probably won't finish at the top of my class, learning things like a breeze. But I know that it doesn't just stop there. Those are not the only things that matter.
BOTTOMLINE:
We all are whom we will ourselves to be.
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